I make a smoothie for myself every morning.

One half cut of frozen batteries

AA, AAA, 9-Volt,

You can have just one variety, too.

Add three-fourths cup of bleach

to make it easier to blend,

less if you like a thinker gulp.

Fresh plastic adds easy petroleum

that you can't taste, and a

good green color, to boot.

Some say local spider pollen

helps with your allergies,

but I can't say it's worked for me.